Aunt Becky, the fantastic author of Mommy Wants Vodka, is hosting a contest on her blog for free stuff. Who doesn’t love free stuff? So all I have to do is answer questions. If only I was as witty as Becky, my answers might be funnier.
1) Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? Interesting question, Becky, thank you for asking. While those rainbow sprinkles add some visual interest, I’d have to say I only like the chocolate kind.
2) If you had to choose one word to banish from the English language, what would it be and why? cockroach. Because even SAYING it gives me chills.
3) If you were a flavor, what would it be? Umm. Well if we’re talking about Ice Cream, I’d probably say Mint Chocolate Chip. Cause a lot of people are weenies and don’t like that (me).
4) What’s the most pointless annoying chore you can think of that you do on a daily/weekly basis? Easy. laundry. There’s too many steps! First you have to retrace your husband/child’s steps and track down all the dirty clothes from all of the insane places they end up. Then the sorting, the washing, and the abhorred folding! And even after all that, you’re not done! You still have to put that shit away. Or so I’m told. Mine sits on top of the dryer until it’s time to wear it again.
5) Of all the nicknames I’ve ever had in my life, Aunt Becky is the most widely known and probably my favorite. What’s your favorite nickname? (for yourself) No one gives me nicknames. I wear my fuck off face and they run away. No seriously. Um. Ok, I guess it would be Cupcake Lady. Cause I bring the sweet, yo!
6) You’re stuck on a desert island with the collective works of 5 (and only five) musical artists for the rest of your life. Who are they? Foo Fighters. Jewel. Blue October. Dave Matthews Band. Hmmm. This 5th one is hard. Either the soundtrack for Wicked or maybe Avenue Q.
7) Everything is better with bacon. True or false? Patently false. Sandwiches, most main courses, even some vegetables, yes. Ice cream, cookies, potato chips, no way!
8 ) If I could go back in time and tell Young Aunt Becky one thing, it would be that out of chaos, order will emerge. Also: tutus go with everything. What would you tell young self? Take care of your body. Don’t continue to give 5 times as much to people who don’t give back. Happiness and love aren’t a magical gift, they are worked for, so enjoy your life.